Friday, January 12, 2007

Drivin Miss Crazy

Yep it's one of those posts.
 
So it took me 20 minutes to go 2 miles today.
"Was it a big accident?", you ask.
 No.  No accident, not even a fender bender. 
"Oh then the volume was heavy." 
 Nope.  Normal (actually it might have even been a little lighter than usual) amounts of people on the road. 
"Bad road conditions? Ice,rain?"
 Not hardly.
 
Simply it was the annoying phenomenon known as friggin' idiots... I mean... rubbernecking.  There was 1, that's right ~1~ car pulled over on the (4 lane) road, I think it was a Taurus, but I don't know as I was trying to just drive unlike the 500 other thought-challenged subhumans surrounding me like a great sea of ineptitude.  Now, the big show stopper for this one, must've been the fact that there were ~2~ police vehicles attending to one car.  Which of course means that it was a drug bust, or they had finally caught the MS-13 gang leader.  (Who was hiding REALLY well in a Taurus, though I think it was gold....)  And no, neither the driver no any passengers (if there even were any) were out of the vehicle.  Completely boring, no activity, yet somehow it cost me time that I will never get back.  So to everyone out there that slowed themselves (and everyone behind them) down, to look at... NOTHING, thank you.  Those of us trying to drive hope you enjoyed yourself, and we look forward to going .5 mph sometime again in the near future.
 
I know, you're prolly saying, "But Ken!  Don't you slow down and look at accidents and stuff too??"
And I would have to say, yes, that on occasion I have slowed down (as much as the person in front of me) to catch a glimpse,  like of the burning truck whilst on the way to a wedding... but at least that was... SOMETHING.  The only time I slow down for someone pulled over, is if the officer may not have enough space to get out, and I can't change lanes to provide it.  Though the vehicle on fire was admitedly interesting.  Had I not been on the way to a friend's wedding, I would have pulled over to watch.  And that's just it.  I don't care if you wanna watch or find out what's going on, I do too.  Just pull over and let the rest of us get on with it.
 
And finally.... to the lady putting on makeup while talking on the phone, AND intermittantly drinking her 'bucks.... please try to keep at least one limb on the wheel as you risk all of our safety.  (And you might want to rethink the eyeshadow color, you're not a summer....)

Monday, January 08, 2007

Yeah, I'm crazy. Big deal.

So I'm finally following up on something I've wanted to do for a long time.  No, it's not jumping out of a perfectly good airplane, or bungee jumping into a gorge.  (Mainly because I have no desire to do either of those things.)  Something much more sedate.  I believe 2007 may be the year that I actually try out some short 3 minute sets on an open mic night.  I know, James, you think I'm too normal to do this, and you may be right.  That of course is not going to stop me.  *grin*  I don't have the dates picked out yet (although according the my book I'm supposed to have them lined up already!) and I may or may not post them here.  If I do you're all welcome to come out and heck... I mean laugh.  Love me or hate me, just don't sit stony-faced and silent!  This pursuit has me very wound up and nervous, and I haven't even signed up for anything yet.  I've wanted to do this for so long, but have let myself talk myself out of it for years on end.  Mainly because not doing it was easier and safer than trying.  Well not this year.
 
I have no idea what material I'd bring yet, but it's got to be worked down until it's short (and hopefully funny).  Although I can tell you that sometimes three minutes on a microphone in front of a large group of people can feel like an eternity.  Then again, if you're having fun it should seem like the blink of an eye.  Maybe I'll try out those new adult undergarments, just in case...
 
Regardless of whether this venture turns out to be positive or negative, I plan to have humor as a major part of my life as long as I'm around.  I may not make money at it, I may not even do more public venues, but it's part of me, and it's time I accepted that.  To all those that have encouraged me along the way for this, I thank you.  For those that didn't... well maybe I can use you for material later.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Out of habit

It's amazing how fast one falls out of the habit of posting... I fear I will never be as consistent as James or any of the other bloggers I link to from time to time.  Ah well, such is life.
 
Belated Merry Christmas.
Happy New Year! (it's the 4th I can still claim this one!)
 
Christmas was good, managed to drive da wife, our pup, and myself up to NY state to see my brother, his boys, and his wife.  My dad and his wife also were up there, so we had a celebration since it has apparently been about 18 years since we were all together for any holiday.  All in all a fun trip.  It also looks like Christmas may be in Texas next year!  If I had known, I would have called dibs first!  ;-)  But it will be nice to get down there as I've been planning a trip for a while, just needed the to put the time together to drive (yes, I'll be driving).
 
As per usual, my bloggin is kick started by a Blog O'Scorn entry.  Although, it is only a semi-scorn.  Yes James, it is about parenting, and how I just don't understand how someone could do this.  At least this time they were held acountable.  Having worked as a child care giver (or as some like to call it - a Manny) I knew where "my kids" were all the time.  I just can't see sleeping and not hearing the friggin' door open!
 
Hopefully the "death-rattle" cough I've developed will go away soon, and may none of you get this cold.  Personally, I think I got it from reading James' blog, since they were sick so much!