The test of a nation...

The test of a group is of how well it treats it's weakest members, like the old, the sick, and it's animals. I am at an exam. If you've followed along any of da wife's posts regarding the health and well-being of our big Doberman, Boris, then you already know things are not going so well.

A brief background on the guy... Boris is a 9 and a half year old red and rust Doberman Pinscher, and one of the sweetest dogs I have ever known (as long as he knows you). He's had a small fight with Wobbler's - a neurological problem usually related to neck/back nerve injury or weakness that causes some instability in the hind legs. That we treated with limiting highly stressful activity, supplements, and some acupuncture, and he was holding steady which is the best you can do in those cases. Then June 14th of last year (2005) he was diagnosed with osteosarcoma in his front left paw. An aggressive form of bone cancer that left him hobbling around. We had his leg amputated and treated him with chemotherapy (among other things). We had no idea how much time it would buy us, but to give you an idea only about 50% of dogs with the same diagnosis and treatment (both amputation and chemo) survived to 1 year post diagnosis. We were fortunate enough to have him with us for almost 17 months. Giving that answer to vets and vet techs that asked how long has resulted in many surprised faces. He's been an inspiration to us, as he's been mostly himself running, playing, and snuggling throughout most of the process. It's more than we expected, and all that we'd hoped for.

And now he's had more heaped upon him. On October 22, he had a grand mal seizure. If you've never seen one of these this is probably the most horrifying thing I've witnessed. Blood and accidents have never bothered me, but this left me very upset. Especially since once he came out of it, he didn't seem to know who either da wife or I was. Brought him in for treatment, got some meds for "just in case it happens again", and then it struck again November 1st. Same duration (1 to 2 minutes), but very disturbing. We took him to get imaged, and found out on Friday (Nov 3rd) that he had a 2.5cm mass in his right cerebral cortex. After all this fighting we had done with him and for him, something else had snuck in under the radar. We spent the weekend kind of in shock, being told that we could talk to the doctors on Tuesday about what kind of treatments would be possible. We had him on anti-convulsives and prednisone thinking we had him at least stabilized. WRONG. Tonight around 7:20 he started seizing again. Only this time it wouldn't stop after 2 minutes. This time it didn't stop even after giving him a 20mg dose of diazipam (read: valium). So we called in, packed up, and drove to the vet ER. I held him in the back of the truck all the way there (40 minutes or so) he seizured the entire way, sometimes violently, sometimes just twitching a little. I tried to keep him calm on the ride, but I don't know if he heard me. As I carried him inside and up the elevator, I just wanted them to calm him down, and make him ok. I wanted my dog to not be hurting or confused anymore. We took him straight to the back where a swarm of technicians and doctors came in to help. We were ushered into a waiting room (realizing I really wouldn't be any help at that point) and hoped for miracles. The first visit the doctor brought us news that they had upped his valium dosage (quite a bit, I'm thinking enough to knock me out for several days, or to make a horse fall asleep given the numbers) but that he was still in seizure. They were going to have to sedate him to interrupt it. Eventually under anesthesia the tremors quieted and while out of it, he was at least no longer bound in the throes of his seizure. At the end of it all, his episode had lasted for almost 2 hours. 2 hours. After 2 minutes he was exhausted from his previous seizures, I can't imagine what 2 hours had done to him. In our final consult we were told they would keep him out for several hours (i.e. overnight) and that they would slowly try to bring him out of it tomorrow morning. If he started back up we had 2 options (we have 2 options even if he doesn't start seizing again) immediate surgery or... release.
Despite all the "extra" time we've been given with him, I still feel cheated. There was supposed to at least be time to consult with the original doctors to find out what options there were if any. If there weren't any, then so be it. We'd give him whatever days he had as a spoiled child. But even that was taken from us. I hate to sound so greedy, when I've been blessed with knowing this grand creature. I'm embarrassed to contemplate what ~he~ would think of my selfishness. So tomorrow we call the doctors and see what they say. We see what they say about 2 hours in seizure and how much damage has already been done. We see what they say the best outcome, the worst outcome, and the most likely outcome for surgery. None seem bright at this hour. I only hope that whatever choices present themselves that we are as dedicated and selfless as the companion whose nose I miss at my hand.



Thank you to my wife that took him to the park today, for his favorite thing next to food - a tour through the park.